Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Sex is Hard

I have a little routine before, during, and after I write.

Usually.

First thing I do is organize my desk. I just can't seem to write if there are too many shiny things on my desk, and since my desk is the Flat Surface of the house right next to the front door (yes, I know, poor planning on my part, but my apartment is tiny, and three people live in it, so I'm doing the best I can), it is the repository for any number of shiny objects. I take all my jewelry back to my bedroom; bead necklaces, mismatched earrings, my squid ring; then any books that I'm not currently reading, move my keys out of reach (because yes, I will fiddle).

And then I open up my WIP and jot the current number of words down on a post-it note. Can I just mention I would die without post-it notes? They are essential to my life.

And then I work.

Theoretically.

Sometimes work is opening my email and spluttering out some half-assed "entertain me" note to a friend. I'll play a few games of Bejeweled Blitz. Check my dragons in another stupid Facebook game. In between, I'll write a few sentences, and if I'm lucky, I'll get sucked in and before I know it, I'm an hour later, with a few pages written. And I go about my day. (Cleaning, being mom, wife, cook, errand-runner, and all those mundane things that if I don't do, no one does.)

Other days... not so much. Like yesterday.

I've finally got my protagonists up to having sex. I write erotica and romantica, so the sex is often the payout for whatever terrible things I've had happen to the characters along the way... the end goal, so to speak.

So I open my WIP, re-read the last few pages to make sure I know where I am... and... wrote an email. And wrote another one. Got a sentence in. Cleaned the living room. Wrote a sentence. Watched some videos on YouPorn (hey, it's research... really. I promise.) Dicked around on Facebook. Wrote two or three sentences and some dialogue. Reminded myself that not everyone talks as much during sex as I do and took some of it back out.

I had my WIP open from 10am until 4:30.

And wrote about six hundred words.

Ug.

And I'm not even to the orgasm.

Good lord.

Sometimes my job is hard.

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